I rarely masturbate with my claw

I rarely masturbate with my claw —
suggested by “The Claw”.

I rarely masturbate with my claw —
suggested by “The Claw”.

Harassed by aliens —
suggested by “Aluminium Hatter”.

My deflated plastic lover —
suggested by “No Women Like Me”.

That didn’t hurt one bit —
suggested by “NoPain”.

I found my birth mother —
suggested by “Detective”.

Making my own ocean —
suggested by “Mr. Bladder”.

Bought you this on eBay —
suggested by “Random Shopper”.

Me and my brother cut his head off —
suggested by “Scissor Bros.”.

He’s going to blow my mind —
suggested by “Found My Big Lover”.

Some days I feel like a giant fool —
suggested by “Big-Noser”.